Five Myths About the 80s
by Peter Gorman
1. CDs Will Limit the Availability of Old Records. I contributed to this one, believing that the
advent of the CD meant that many obscure classic albums of days gone by would never be released
on the new format due to a lack of commercial demand, and would disappear completely as the
record companies stopped producing vinyl. The opposite happened, however, because CDs actually
cost less to produce than vinyl records, and though some albums still go out of print, they all
eventually come back in. The downside? Whereas in the past the crap that sold well would
eventually go out of print, now even the crap that sold poorly remains available on CD. This
could lead to all sorts of nasty social problems, such as a proliferation of motivational
speakers, or counter-revolution.
2. That Guy In The Clash Used To Be That Guy In Foreigner.
I often heard this one in high school back in the early 80s,
kids having gotten it into their heads that because there was a guy in both bands named Mick
Jones, he was obviously the same person. This was of course false, based on the simple rule that
musicians from the coolest bands don't also spend time with the blandest. Get real, people.
3. Tommy Stinson Joined Guns 'n' Roses. See what I mean? This rumor of fairly recent vintage
had the teenage bass player in the Replacements, the definition of a cool band, joining Guns 'n'
Roses, your stoopid little brother's favorite band. This is the kind of rumor that should never
get started, due to its implausibility. I mean, who would believe such a thing? It's laughable
that anyone took this seriously. What's that? Oh... uh, wait a minute... 4. "Just Say No To Drugs." Are you kidding me? Once you're hooked it's impossible to
even just say no to cigarettes and coffee. James Honeyman-Scott and Pete Farndon, R.I.P.
5. 5. MTV Was Bad For Rock Music. I used to believe this was true, that
the visual concerns of MTV heavily influenced the marketplace, and the bands that looked the
part were the ones getting the contracts and the airplay regardless of the quality of their
music, while greater talents went unheard. Then I heard Phil Collins say that if he were getting
started today he would never get heard because he was too ugly for television. Now I wish that
MTV had been around in the late 70s, or even earlier. Come back Martha Quinn, all is forgiven.
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